IN LIFE there are a handful of things that everyone must deal with, and a few feelings everyone will experience at least once, like hate, helplessness and love.
For most, one of the quests that occupy our minds is the search for the person that would make the perfect partner – our soul mates.
When people talk about their idea of a perfect soul mate they can’t agree on an exact definition because, similar to our perspectives on life, we all view it from a different angle. Imagine standing in front of a pyramid with people surrounding it from every point: everyone may agree on what to label it or its general features, but only a few may agree on the same level of visual details.
The closest thing I can find to a universally agreed description of ‘soul mates’ would be a person we would want to share the rest of our lives with.
While this concept may be overrated for some, I will only talk about my view of soul mates or as I like to call them: Constants. In physics, a variable is the part of the equation that can be changed while the constant is the part of the equation that, if changed, the equation loses its original function. So for me, the view of soul mates as constants is as science geek as it gets.
Again, given that we are diverse, constants come in a variety of types. Here are some examples of the type of constants that we might encounter.
You may share more differences than similarities with this constant, and yet your characteristics complement each other.
For example, a very hyperactive, talkative guy and a shy, quiet girl may work better together than with a partner who shares the same characteristics. He may introduce to her a better way of socialising with some people, and she may calm him down so he won’t come off too strong to others.
Being with a constant who complements our characteristics may also provide a different view of seeing things and therefore new insight. People who mingle well with different types of personalities may find their complementary opposites to be a perfect match.
The mirror constant
Mirror-image constants are people who share similar personality traits with you. This type of constant is perfect for people who work better with those who share the same wavelength as them over those who may share similar interests.
Personally, sometimes I think it would be amazing to live with ‘myself’ and other times I think I would kill ‘myself’. Imagine if you just had a bad day and you are an optimistic, glass half-full type of person; wouldn’t it be really nice to have that outlook reinforced or enabled by your constant?
That being said, personality clashes might occur since not only do you share the positive side of the same personality but also the negative. Being with the mirror constant may make a good time great and a bad fight worse. Taking that into account, if your idea of living with ‘yourself’ sounds like a good one, the mirror constant is your perfect match.
The practical constant is the type who might not share similar personality traits, interests or views but they do offer companionship.
Some people look for constants more out of convenience and practicality than out of any romantic reasons, which is not wrong. Relationships used to be just like a flu shot, mostly for security rather than desire. Having the perfect partner or a relationship based on emotions rather than need is a new-age concept.
So if an attachment built on convenience or practicality is what you are looking for, the practical constant is your perfect match.
The best friend constant
In my opinion the best friend constants are the best of all because they can be any of the above type of constants with one important addition: attitude.
Attitude separates a friend from a best friend and is someone who shares a direct correlation with your personal experiences and interests. The best friend constant is the one who says: “You go, I go man!”
Think about it, your best friends share the same interests, habits or experiences that matter; they are your partners-in-crime and the people who have had more time and opportunities to get to know and admire you for who you are.
Tons of movies have been made about the best friend constant that has been there all along while the main character struggles with their false ideas of their ideal constants.
My favorite description of the best friend constant is “Finding someone with the same mental disability as you… PRICELESS!”. So if you are the type of person where understanding, comfort and loyalty matter the most, the best friend is your match.
The perfect constant
Yeah… that doesn’t exist, sorry. But here, have a potato 😀
There are seven billion people on earth – which is a lot, you have to admit – yet some people claim that it is impossible to find their soul mate. If you are the one in a million that Neyo sang about, there are 7,000 people who can be your constant which is probability’s way of saying, “Your argument is invalid.”
Of course, the thing that makes it hard to find any of those 7,000 constants is the fact that they are spread around the globe, which is probability’s way of saying, “I get it.”
Knowing which type of constant we want to share the rest of our lives with might make the process of searching much easier, and the heartache from the search much less.